New Vampire Shit Thread! Now with 100% less bitching about

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 2:12 pm

Rev Rants.

Seriously, I'm starting this thread to ask for some help with something I'm trying to create. The first post about the Rev Rants was helpful, all the bitching after it was not. If you want to fuck each other over some nerd's rant, start a new thread.

So, last two questions I asked:
1-What, to you, are essential vampire traits?
2-see poll

RobbyPants · Post by **RobbyPants** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 2:40 pm

Honestly, I find all four of those suitable. The ash one is actually an interesting one I've never considered. Still, I'd be totally fine with the first option: they can eat it and everything appears normal, but they still only get nourished from blood.

I'd actually go so far as to say they should only get nourishment form blood of living creatures, but that might be the topic of another thread.

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 3:13 pm

Again and still, it depends on what you want your vampires to do. The Vampire Encyclopedia is 800 fucking pages long. If you want sexy vampires, they need to be able to put things in their mouths, because eating is sexy. If they are cursed-by-gods vampires they shouldn't be able to eat, because eating is fun and that's off limits.

-Username17

CatharzGodfoot · Post by **CatharzGodfoot** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 5:11 pm

FrankTrollman wrote:Again and still, it depends on what you want your vampires to do. The Vampire Encyclopedia is 800 fucking pages long. If you want sexy vampires, they need to be able to put things in their mouths, because eating is sexy. If they are cursed-by-gods vampires they shouldn't be able to eat, because eating is fun and that's off limits.

-Username17

Sexy vampires don't have to swallow.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 5:55 pm

CatharzGodfoot wrote:Sexy vampires don't have to swallow.

Sexy Vampires definitely have to swallow.

Judging__Eagle · Post by **Judging__Eagle** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 6:08 pm

A sexy vampire needs to be able to eat and swallow consumables of all kinds.

Catharz, they may not have to swallow, but if they do, their sexiness rating goes up moar. Since we want sexiness rating to be high on sexy vampires, they obviously can and do, swallow.

Seriously, watching someone eating a steak or pastries or sushi can be really appealing. Watching a person, stare at their food is not.

A lame cursed vampire will seriously be the Count Dracula from the John Malkovich movie; and will be seriously, a person with rat teeth, fangs, bald, with long filthy finger-claws. Also, sort of ugly, and not a good dresser.

tzor · Post by **tzor** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 6:35 pm

Kaelik wrote:Sexy Vampires definitely have to swallow.

That reminds me of a really bad B movie dream I once had.

Summary of movie plot in dream: A trio of seemingly lovely orally castrating vampires seek high school science nerds to tempt and feed from in an eternal struggle to remain forever young looking.

violence in the media · Tue Dec 01, 2009 6:51 pm

tzor wrote:
Kaelik wrote:Sexy Vampires definitely have to swallow.
That reminds me of a really bad B movie dream I once had.

Summary of movie plot in dream: A trio of seemingly lovely orally castrating vampires seek high school science nerds to tempt and feed from in an eternal struggle to remain forever young looking.

I think that was a bad B movie.

deathdealingjawa · Post by **deathdealingjawa** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 8:03 pm

I think of vampires more like creatures of envy. Never able to fully enjoy life, but also not willing to move on. feeding is one of the few ways they are able to feel alive.

as for the other discussion in this topic Flesh for the Beast was the closest B movie that came to mind.

violence in the media · Tue Dec 01, 2009 8:14 pm

Hmm, I was actually thinking of either Vamp or Once Bitten.

Kaelik · Post by **Kaelik** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 8:14 pm

deathdealingjawa wrote:I think of vampires more like creatures of envy. Never able to fully enjoy life, but also not willing to move on. feeding is one of the few ways they are able to feel alive.

That's called "cursed Vampire."

TOZ · Post by **TOZ** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 9:35 pm

Think of the breath on a vampire who was stuck with the 'rots in stomach' option. *shudders*

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 11:00 pm

FrankTrollman wrote:Again and still, it depends on what you want your vampires to do. The Vampire Encyclopedia is 800 fucking pages long. If you want sexy vampires, they need to be able to put things in their mouths, because eating is sexy. If they are cursed-by-gods vampires they shouldn't be able to eat, because eating is fun and that's off limits.

-Username17

Yes Frank, I know how long the Vampire Encyclopedia is, I have it, and it scares me with the amount of information it holds, what's scarier is that there's stuff that it didn't include...

I've got vampires representing civilization so far. Werewolves will represent nature, of course. Other than that, they're bastards who protect supernatural society by killing those who endanger it, mainly because they don't want hunters on their own asses.

Robby, the ash thing is actually from Vampire the Masquerade.

Toz, I imagine some would make use of their undead regenerating nature to simply cut the food out of their stomachs later.

TOZ · Post by **TOZ** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 11:37 pm

Depends on if they're the pretty boy tragic types or the ugly monster types.

And thinking about it, if the system functions from mouth to stomach, there is little reason for the intestines to be nonfunctional. Vampires could process it through about the same as living creatures handle bulk product. Only irregular items might get jammed somewhere and create a blockage since it wouldn't be digested down. Talk about painful.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Tue Dec 01, 2009 11:44 pm

yeah, that was another part I'd thought of. Though mainly it occured to me that a vampire who drank alcohol would piss whatever alcoholic drink he imbibed. From a solid stout to vodka.

also, we're talking "monsters that look pretty much like everyone else unless you catch them at a bad time" mostly because the tragic pretty boys get kicked into sunlight.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 5:18 am

TOZ: Talk about a good reason to chew your food, if they can't actually digest it for nutrients. And bloating and gas.

Ugh.

-Crissa

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 6:12 am

You realize that vampires in The Masquerade didn't actually transform food into ash, right? "Turning to ash in their mouths" is a piece of standardized hyperbole that means that nothing tastes good. It's like how people are "sick to death" of a subject don't actually die, they are just bored to the point of annoyance.

-Username17

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 6:54 am

huh. Thought food literally became ash in the mouth of a VtM vampire.... I could swear I recall something talking about them having to vomit up ash after eating...

ubernoob · Post by **ubernoob** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 8:52 am

Vampires should be fabulous. There are plenty of ugly undead. Pretty undead are more rare. Plus, vampires are associated with nobility. Nobility should be pretty.

Yes, having to vomit after every meal is not pretty.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 9:27 am

but they don't have to eat. Normal food is a luxury most won't care about. and having to eliminate the chewed but undigested food in some way is the price of that luxury.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 7:32 pm

Nobility do lots of ugly things in private to remain pretty in public.

These are vampires, not angels.

-Crissa

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 8:43 pm

perfectly put Crissa.

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 9:05 pm

I think pretty vampires should be able to eat to play up the angle of 'parasitic aristocrats are better than you; don't you just hate them'?

In such a case vampires should be inconvenienced as little as possible while still keeping them vampires. They should be able to eat better, look better, and fuck better. Immortality and super powers does go a long way but I say that they should go whole hog.

The whole point of doing things this way is to eliminate the sour grapes aspects of vampires so that when non-vampires look at them there's a feeling of resentment and envy at their condition, rather than pity. After all, it's a common theme in stories where evil people get a lot of bennies at the cost of being evil. That way people feel more for their beset-upon opponents who don't get anything for being on Team Good.

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 9:14 pm

Lago PARANOIA wrote:That way people feel more for their beset-upon opponents who don't get anything for being on Team Good.

[okay, that was a bitch response.]

there isn't really a team good.

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Wed Dec 02, 2009 9:36 pm

Yeah, but since you haven't actually bothered to explain what "this project" entails, there's still no way for anyone to answer any of your questions. In the absence of incredibly specific scenario descriptions there's just no way to reply to "HOW SHOULD MY VAMPIRES BE?" because you know, our vampires are different.

So honestly, write your story and figure out what the fuck you want vampirism to represent in it and stop jerking us around. Even responding to your thread at this point is not really different from masturbating a folklore wang.

-Username17

The Gaming Den

New Vampire Shit Thread! Now with 100% less bitching about

What do you think should happen when a vampire eats normal food?

New Vampire Shit Thread! Now with 100% less bitching about